Age, Sojin (Girl’s Day)

My age is…hm…secret!

- Sojin, Girl’s Day [GD Kira Kira Slim Ep. 1]

Education, Evan Esar (1899-1995)

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.

- Evan Esar (1899-1995)

When you want to go someplace...

My two-year-old cousin scared us one summer by disappearing during our lakeside vacation. More than a dozen relatives searched the forest and shoreline, and everyone was relieved when we found Matthew playing calmly in the woods.

"Listen to me!" his mother said sharply, "From now on when you want to go someplace, you tell Mommy first, okay?"

Matthew thought about that for a moment and said: "Okay, Disney World."

[Humor] Before it starts...

A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, "Get me a beer before it starts." The wife sighs and gets him a beer.

Fifteen minutes later, he says, "Get me another beer before it starts."
She looks cross, but fetches another beer and slams it down next to him.

He finishes that beer and a few minutes later says, "Quick, get me another beer, it's going to start any minute."

The wife is furious. She yells at him, "Is that all you're going to do tonight? Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? You're nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob, and furthermore ..."

The man sighs and says, "It's started ..."

[Humor] Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner

One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself.

Tom wasn't happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?"

Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?"

Tom: "The smaller piece, of course."

Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"

Which Service?

Which Service?

A young boy was visiting a church for the first time, checking all the announcements and posters along the walls. When he came to a group of pictures of men in uniform, he asked a nearby woman, “Who are all those men in the pictures?”The woman replied,“ Those are our boys who died in the service.”Surprised, the youngster asked, “Was that the morning service or the evening service?”

A women he wanted to marry....

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.

One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"

Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."

His friend thought for a moment and said, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother."

A few months later they met again and his friend said, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"

With a frown on his face, Fred answered, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."

The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"

Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."