A shy little 4-year-old came in to the dentist for his first cleaning and check-up.
The hygienist tried to strike up a conversation but no re-sponse.
After the cleaning, the dentist was called in to do the final check.
The dentist tried to strike up a conversation as well. "How old are you?" No response.
The dentist then asked, "Don't you know how old you are?"
Immediately four tiny fingers went up. "Oh," replied the dentist, "and do you know how old that is?"
Four little fingers went up once again.
Continuing the effort to get a response, the dentist asked, "Can you talk?"
The solemn little patient looked at him and asked, "Yes. Can you count?"
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
A blonde and a scale
A blonde holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks the clerk if she can use the store's baby scale.
"Sorry, ma'am," says the clerk. "Our baby scale is broken. But we can figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the first."
"Oh, that won't work," says the blonde.
"Why not?" asks the clerk.
"Because," she answers, "I'm not the mother - I'm the aunt."
"Sorry, ma'am," says the clerk. "Our baby scale is broken. But we can figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the first."
"Oh, that won't work," says the blonde.
"Why not?" asks the clerk.
"Because," she answers, "I'm not the mother - I'm the aunt."
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
An old man and his wife
An old man and his wife
An old man is afraid that his wife is loosing her hearing. So, he walks up right to her ear and asks, "Can you hear me?"
She didn't answer. He walked up closer and asked again. But there was no answer.
Finally he asked her one more time really loud and his wife said, "for the third time yes!!!"
An old man is afraid that his wife is loosing her hearing. So, he walks up right to her ear and asks, "Can you hear me?"
She didn't answer. He walked up closer and asked again. But there was no answer.
Finally he asked her one more time really loud and his wife said, "for the third time yes!!!"
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Hello UFO
Hello UFO
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off.
"Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?"
"Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!"
The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
http://www.coolblondejokes.com/FunnyJokes/HelloUFO.shtml
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off.
"Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?"
"Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!"
The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
http://www.coolblondejokes.com/FunnyJokes/HelloUFO.shtml
Monday, October 11, 2010
Cheating
Cheating
A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.
Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..."
The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"
A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.
Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..."
The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Running from the Cops
Running from the Cops
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde were all running from the cops. They decided to split up. The brunette went to the west and jumped in with a pack of dogs. She started barking so the cops went after the red-head. The red-head went to east and jumped in with a pack of cats. She started meowing so the cops went after the blonde. The blonde went south and jumped into a vegetable garden. When the cops caught up with her, she began repeating, "Photosyntehsis, photosynthesis..."
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde were all running from the cops. They decided to split up. The brunette went to the west and jumped in with a pack of dogs. She started barking so the cops went after the red-head. The red-head went to east and jumped in with a pack of cats. She started meowing so the cops went after the blonde. The blonde went south and jumped into a vegetable garden. When the cops caught up with her, she began repeating, "Photosyntehsis, photosynthesis..."
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Blonde getting a Car
Blonde getting a Car
One day a blonde walks into a car shop. She looks around to see if she can find the perfect car for herself.
She finds a beautiful car with fine leather, but as she bends over to feel it she lets out a fart!
She looks around to see if anyone noticed, but as she turns she sees the sales guy is behind her so she askes him
"How much is this car"
He replies back "Miss, If you farted just by touching the leather you're going to shit yourself when hear the price!"
http://www.coolblondejokes.com
One day a blonde walks into a car shop. She looks around to see if she can find the perfect car for herself.
She finds a beautiful car with fine leather, but as she bends over to feel it she lets out a fart!
She looks around to see if anyone noticed, but as she turns she sees the sales guy is behind her so she askes him
"How much is this car"
He replies back "Miss, If you farted just by touching the leather you're going to shit yourself when hear the price!"
http://www.coolblondejokes.com
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)